Classes can hardly ever be refreshing. 9 AM ones even less so. This one was just another such early morning class when I had dragged myself to the classroom.What more, it was a Sunday morning - a time when the majority of the sane world is hours away from getting off the bed. And then if you have taken an elective which only a few others have, then all of you put together are just too few in number to take the liberty to doze off in class.
Nevertheless, amidst strings of naps that lasted a few seconds (usually the times when the Professor is busy writing on the board), what struck me sometime in the middle of the lecture was this amazing concept that the Professor talked about. It was an "Options and Futures" class (scary stuff - isn't it! Nice way to brag on one's own blog!)- and the Professor was talking about the various ways one can use Stock Index Futures (I can easily imagine a big chunk of readers who have got until this point stopping right here! However, if you have ever invested in stocks / plan to do so in future, its worth continuing reading - trust me!)
Most of the times, when we are investing in the stock of a company, we are betting on the company to do well. What we tend to forget is that as we bought the stock, we not only took up the risk that the company may or may not do well, but also the risk that the market-in-general may or may not do well. Even if we do have that in mind, we usually do nothing about it. (Frankly, the "we" here means novice investors - which includes me!).
So, for example, if you invest in Company A purely because you think it will do well, and say some event occurs which brings the whole market down (Government toppled - War with Pakistan - etc), pulling down our dear Company A with it, then you make a loss even when your view on the company was probably correct. (The market-in-general say went down by 20%, while Company A went down by 5%. Hence the Company A has outperformed the market - but you still make a loss - you would have been much better off parking that money in a Savings Bank account!)
One way to ensure that your money is precisely where you want it to be is to go long on the stock and short on the index futures.(For the benefit of those who could not get head or tail of the last sentence - it simply means that you bet on the stock to do well and so you buy it now, and at the same time you also bet on the market-in-general to not do well and so you get into a contract saying - "I will make money if the market does not do well after 3 months, and lose if it does").
What this ensures is that the gains (or losses) you make in the stock purely because of the market 's performance in general are cancelled out by the losses (or gains) you make in the the contract. Thus you are left with the gains (or losses) which can be purely attributed to the stock! So, the investment is as good as your view on the company (and the company alone - not the market-in-general) with which you wanted to invest in the first place.
And I was awake for the rest of the class!
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Tie Un-Tie
The absolute disgust of having to wear a tie everyday (okay, except Fridays and working Saturdays – Thank God for small mercies) to office during the last two months has made the rebel inside me wake up and give this serious issue some even more serious thought.
So this is how it works – you wrap a long piece of cloth around your neck, making loops and knots and finally push one end down and the knot up so that it is looks the way it should look.
In the evening you remove the damn thing off.
And in between, the thing hangs down your neck.
This is the thing which makes you look formal – the thing which symbolises that you really mean business – that you are very serious about your work and not taking it casually.
Well, I am somehow not too convinced. If that indeed is the case – then why is a tie not a part of the formal dress code for women. Do they not need to look like they mean business? (Disclaimer: I hope it is understood that this is a rhetoric question – I am not to be blamed if some highly proactive organization introduces ties as a formal dress code for women)
So, I put on my thinking cap and tried to imagine the various ways in which the useless looking piece of fabric can be put to some use for the good of this world. So here goes the list.
· For wiping sweat off your face – the positioning of a tie is really strategic (oh, physical positioning that is – just in case you thought I am taking this opportunity to give some marketing gyan). I mean how cumbersome it is to get your hand inside your pockets, take out your handkerchief, do the needful, and put it back in the pocket. The tie saves a lot of time and serves the same purpose.
o Counter-argument – Offices are usually Air Conditioned. So no sweat!
· For ensuring a clean nose when suffering from cold – this point actually stems from the counterargument mentioned above. Sometimes “hot and cold areas in the same office” (no, this blog is not sponsored by Blue Star) can lead to a running nose. The convenience of using a tie in this case is similar to that mentioned earlier.
o Counter-argument – A tie can prove to be inadequate if the severity of the running nose is very high – the much larger surface area of the handkerchief scores over the long but thin tie.
· For wiping off tears when you get bashed by your boss – this particular use just fits so well in the “formal” office scenario.
o Counter-argument – similar to one mentioned for running-nose. A tie may just not be adequate enough.
· To be used as a leash by your boss – this again fits well in the office scenario.
o Counter-argument - Why should the biggest boss in the office wear a tie? Agreed he would be meeting clients/ partners etc who would want to have a leash around him, but that does not happen every day.
The strong counter arguments for each possible use that I could think of lead me to believe that we are just following some silly norm which does not make even a little bit of sense. It is high time we un-tie ourselves from the unnecessary knots we have got ourselves into !
So this is how it works – you wrap a long piece of cloth around your neck, making loops and knots and finally push one end down and the knot up so that it is looks the way it should look.
In the evening you remove the damn thing off.
And in between, the thing hangs down your neck.
This is the thing which makes you look formal – the thing which symbolises that you really mean business – that you are very serious about your work and not taking it casually.
Well, I am somehow not too convinced. If that indeed is the case – then why is a tie not a part of the formal dress code for women. Do they not need to look like they mean business? (Disclaimer: I hope it is understood that this is a rhetoric question – I am not to be blamed if some highly proactive organization introduces ties as a formal dress code for women)
So, I put on my thinking cap and tried to imagine the various ways in which the useless looking piece of fabric can be put to some use for the good of this world. So here goes the list.
· For wiping sweat off your face – the positioning of a tie is really strategic (oh, physical positioning that is – just in case you thought I am taking this opportunity to give some marketing gyan). I mean how cumbersome it is to get your hand inside your pockets, take out your handkerchief, do the needful, and put it back in the pocket. The tie saves a lot of time and serves the same purpose.
o Counter-argument – Offices are usually Air Conditioned. So no sweat!
· For ensuring a clean nose when suffering from cold – this point actually stems from the counterargument mentioned above. Sometimes “hot and cold areas in the same office” (no, this blog is not sponsored by Blue Star) can lead to a running nose. The convenience of using a tie in this case is similar to that mentioned earlier.
o Counter-argument – A tie can prove to be inadequate if the severity of the running nose is very high – the much larger surface area of the handkerchief scores over the long but thin tie.
· For wiping off tears when you get bashed by your boss – this particular use just fits so well in the “formal” office scenario.
o Counter-argument – similar to one mentioned for running-nose. A tie may just not be adequate enough.
· To be used as a leash by your boss – this again fits well in the office scenario.
o Counter-argument - Why should the biggest boss in the office wear a tie? Agreed he would be meeting clients/ partners etc who would want to have a leash around him, but that does not happen every day.
The strong counter arguments for each possible use that I could think of lead me to believe that we are just following some silly norm which does not make even a little bit of sense. It is high time we un-tie ourselves from the unnecessary knots we have got ourselves into !
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Fin's loss is Mar's gain!
Following is an (edited) version of a chat log between me and my classmate Vikash...
...
Vikash: waise ab maine decide kar liya hai. I'll major in Marketing me: KYAA? Vikash: bas me: yeh sunne se pehle mera GTalk crash kyon nahi ho gaya!
Vikash : Naseeb ko kaun badal sakta hai. My expectations from cost accounting are going loyyyyyyyer. Is it not? I have started appreciating that typically Marketing is what I am made for.
me: Kya yeh tera aakhri faisla hai?
Vikash : Haan
me : par tu toh hamesha finance finance..
Vikask : kehta tha. Par jab utne hi paise, aur dher sa aaraam, jab mujhe Marketing mein mile. Tab koi woh kyon le, yeh na le
me: Maan gaye..
Vikash : Kisey?
me: Aap ki paarkhi nazar, aur marketing ka asar. Donon ko!
Update: Vikash got placed in Wipro (Corporate Finance)
...
KYAAAAA?
KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA?
KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA?
bassss
bassssssssssssss
Vikash : Naseeb ko kaun badal sakta hai. My expectations from cost accounting are going loyyyyyyyer. Is it not? I have started appreciating that typically Marketing is what I am made for.
me: Kya yeh tera aakhri faisla hai?
Vikash : Haan
me : par tu toh hamesha finance finance..
Vikask : kehta tha. Par jab utne hi paise, aur dher sa aaraam, jab mujhe Marketing mein mile. Tab koi woh kyon le, yeh na le
me: Maan gaye..
Vikash : Kisey?
me: Aap ki paarkhi nazar, aur marketing ka asar. Donon ko!
Update: Vikash got placed in Wipro (Corporate Finance)
Monday, October 20, 2008
Murphy's law strikes thrice!!!
Had a bad day in the marketing class today. Our professor keeps a surprise quiz when the number of absentess crosses a certain threshold - but the quiz is supposed to be very simple so that all those who are present are rewarded for showing themselves up.
Now then - it was one of those days. The quiz was on a case which we were supposed to do for the class today. The questions were (as I later found out) straightforward.Moreover, it was an open-case quiz, meaning you could make full use of the resources. But then if something can go wrong, then it surely will, and Mr. Murphy ensured all the three doors of escape for me were closed.
1. I had not read the case, had no clue about it.
2. In a hurry for the morning class, I took the wrong Marketing book with me. I spent the first 3 minutes of the 7 minute test trying to figure out where the case was - only to realise I wouldn't find it in that book even if I spent my entire lifetime searching there.
3. For once (probably because of the large number of absentees) there was noone sitting next to me
I might as well have slept off in my room!;)
Now then - it was one of those days. The quiz was on a case which we were supposed to do for the class today. The questions were (as I later found out) straightforward.Moreover, it was an open-case quiz, meaning you could make full use of the resources. But then if something can go wrong, then it surely will, and Mr. Murphy ensured all the three doors of escape for me were closed.
1. I had not read the case, had no clue about it.
2. In a hurry for the morning class, I took the wrong Marketing book with me. I spent the first 3 minutes of the 7 minute test trying to figure out where the case was - only to realise I wouldn't find it in that book even if I spent my entire lifetime searching there.
3. For once (probably because of the large number of absentees) there was noone sitting next to me
I might as well have slept off in my room!;)
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Violent me!
I close my eyes...
..and imagine...
the person in front of me is tied on to a chair,and I am splashing hot boiling water on his face...
he minces in pain...
but I am not going to show any mercy..sorry..
next I make him lie on a slab of ice..he screams ... but I just smile a wicked smile...there's worse in store for you mister..
..then I make him travel in an auto rickshaw in Mumbai which is following the exhaust of a truck all the time...and the stream of exhaust is directed right at his face..his hands are tied so he can't even cover his face..all he can do is cough...
...then I make him stand on a railway platform in Mumbai at 7.30 in the morning..and make him board each local train and alight it on the same platform...the mad crowd does the rest..abusing,kicking and punching him at all places..
..and then...it just keeps getting worse..
"Mandar..I think we are done for today, you can open your eyes now"..says the dentist.
I open my eyes,and smile in relief.."done for today"..three golden words I was waiting to hear since the last hour an hour..a period in which I made the dentist go through so many different interesting things in mind...
A root canal is one of those things which you would not want even your worst enemy to experience. And unfortunately, I have had two in the last year. Somehow my teeth behave rather strangely - they skip all the intermediate stages of decay (that I now have by heart what with staring at those posters waiting outside for my turn at the dentist's clinic) and start paining only when root canal is the only solution left - and I have to find more creative ways of punishing the dentist while he is operating on me.
Nevertheless, the visit I had at dentist's yesterday was by far the best ever I have ever had. For the first time I went to the dentist for a "routine checkup" - and not with holding one side of my jaw. It was over even before I thought it started - the dentist gave me a clean chit after having a look at my teeth. And I was more happy than I was at that point in our XLRI adventure trip - when we successfully built our own raft, touched the other end of a lake in windy and rainy conditions, and came back with the same number of passengers as we had started with.
So the moral of the story is - brush twice a day to keep the dentist away - a small piece of advice that we have been hearing since childhood but hardly does anyone adhere to. This -as you must have observed in the first part of this blog - is one of the reasons for the increasing violence in this world. This world would be so much more peaceful if only everyone would brush twice a day! ;)
..and imagine...
the person in front of me is tied on to a chair,and I am splashing hot boiling water on his face...
he minces in pain...
but I am not going to show any mercy..sorry..
next I make him lie on a slab of ice..he screams ... but I just smile a wicked smile...there's worse in store for you mister..
..then I make him travel in an auto rickshaw in Mumbai which is following the exhaust of a truck all the time...and the stream of exhaust is directed right at his face..his hands are tied so he can't even cover his face..all he can do is cough...
...then I make him stand on a railway platform in Mumbai at 7.30 in the morning..and make him board each local train and alight it on the same platform...the mad crowd does the rest..abusing,kicking and punching him at all places..
..and then...it just keeps getting worse..
"Mandar..I think we are done for today, you can open your eyes now"..says the dentist.
I open my eyes,and smile in relief.."done for today"..three golden words I was waiting to hear since the last hour an hour..a period in which I made the dentist go through so many different interesting things in mind...
A root canal is one of those things which you would not want even your worst enemy to experience. And unfortunately, I have had two in the last year. Somehow my teeth behave rather strangely - they skip all the intermediate stages of decay (that I now have by heart what with staring at those posters waiting outside for my turn at the dentist's clinic) and start paining only when root canal is the only solution left - and I have to find more creative ways of punishing the dentist while he is operating on me.
Nevertheless, the visit I had at dentist's yesterday was by far the best ever I have ever had. For the first time I went to the dentist for a "routine checkup" - and not with holding one side of my jaw. It was over even before I thought it started - the dentist gave me a clean chit after having a look at my teeth. And I was more happy than I was at that point in our XLRI adventure trip - when we successfully built our own raft, touched the other end of a lake in windy and rainy conditions, and came back with the same number of passengers as we had started with.
So the moral of the story is - brush twice a day to keep the dentist away - a small piece of advice that we have been hearing since childhood but hardly does anyone adhere to. This -as you must have observed in the first part of this blog - is one of the reasons for the increasing violence in this world. This world would be so much more peaceful if only everyone would brush twice a day! ;)
Thursday, July 3, 2008
Isn't it Saturday yet?
Place : XLRI Hostel
Time : 7.00 am,Thursday
Its been 20 days since arriving here.The alarm rings (In my room you will find it ringing every now and then - the "alarm bells" are always ringing ! ).I wake up, and see my roomie has also woken up because of the alarm.And I ask him - "Isn't it Saturday today?" . Frustated,he shouts back "IT'S THURSDAY!!!"
Weekends!Why dont they come a few more times in a week!
Time : 7.00 am,Thursday
Its been 20 days since arriving here.The alarm rings (In my room you will find it ringing every now and then - the "alarm bells" are always ringing ! ).I wake up, and see my roomie has also woken up because of the alarm.And I ask him - "Isn't it Saturday today?" . Frustated,he shouts back "IT'S THURSDAY!!!"
Weekends!Why dont they come a few more times in a week!
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Tamil ille
In keeping with my love of talking about public transport,here I am going to tell you about my maiden auto riksha ride on my maiden trip to chennai last week.:).
Me and a few of my school buddies decided to meet at Ispahani Center (a mall) in Nungambakkam.I had no other means to reach there , but to take an auto.So i ventured out in the hot Chennai Sun looking for one.
I waved at the first empty auto that I saw,and well,it stopped.The driver wearing a shirt and a lungi looked at me and said something in tamil.
Me: Nungambakkam?
He: ########################## (Something fairly long in tamil,couldnt make out a single word)
Me:Tamil ille..English?Hindi?
He:(Smiling ) #############################
Me : (whats he saying...surely he is saying a lot of things.Even a shake of the head would have answered my question) Ispahani Center?Nungambakkam?Gemini Bus stop? ( a few keywords that I had asked my buddies to enrich me with)
He:############## HUNDRED RUPEES ############
Me : (finally..seems like I have a deal here..but why does he have to speak so much knowing that I cant understand tamil?) Thanks..(and I sit in the rick)
The meter in the rick looked cool..the readings were digital (as opposed to the mechanical meters in mumbai ricks).But then how does it matter.They dont use the meters anyway in Chennai.
After about half an hour of travelling,the auto driver slowed down and looked at me..
He: ########### nungambakkam ###########
Me:Ispahani Center?
He( his expression said that he did not know where that Ispahani Center is) ######### Gemini ##########
So we had come to Gemini,now the task was to find Ispahani Centre.It would be close by ,as I had been told.So I paid him 100 bucks and got out of the rick.
I stop a passer by.
Me:Excuse me,Where is Ispahani Center?
PB1: pata nahi jee,mein yahan naya aaya hoon
(oops..finally someone who understands hindi...but he doesnt know the place..what bad luck!)
I move on to the next passer by.
Me:Excuse me,Where is Ispahani Center?
PB2:###########
Me:Tamil ille..English??Hindi???
PB2:(smiling)#####(and he shows me a direction)
I start moving in that direction.Suddenly there is a shout (in tamil) from behind.Its PB2 shouting something at me.He is pointing towards a group of people near me.I am like ..What???He continued pointing towards those people (who are not looking at either of us).Finally I understood what he wanted to say.He did not know where the place is!!!.He had just told me to go and ask those people sitting there!Oh God!!
Fortunately,a few in that group of people could speak english,and as it turned out , knew where Ispahani Center was as well.After a few right and left turns (as explained by them),I finally reach the place.
Later on while reciting this entire incident to my buddies,I came to know that "tamil ille" actually means "there is no tamil" or "tamil does not exist". :P Ooops
Me and a few of my school buddies decided to meet at Ispahani Center (a mall) in Nungambakkam.I had no other means to reach there , but to take an auto.So i ventured out in the hot Chennai Sun looking for one.
I waved at the first empty auto that I saw,and well,it stopped.The driver wearing a shirt and a lungi looked at me and said something in tamil.
Me: Nungambakkam?
He: ########################## (Something fairly long in tamil,couldnt make out a single word)
Me:Tamil ille..English?Hindi?
He:(Smiling ) #############################
Me : (whats he saying...surely he is saying a lot of things.Even a shake of the head would have answered my question) Ispahani Center?Nungambakkam?Gemini Bus stop? ( a few keywords that I had asked my buddies to enrich me with)
He:############## HUNDRED RUPEES ############
Me : (finally..seems like I have a deal here..but why does he have to speak so much knowing that I cant understand tamil?) Thanks..(and I sit in the rick)
The meter in the rick looked cool..the readings were digital (as opposed to the mechanical meters in mumbai ricks).But then how does it matter.They dont use the meters anyway in Chennai.
After about half an hour of travelling,the auto driver slowed down and looked at me..
He: ########### nungambakkam ###########
Me:Ispahani Center?
He( his expression said that he did not know where that Ispahani Center is) ######### Gemini ##########
So we had come to Gemini,now the task was to find Ispahani Centre.It would be close by ,as I had been told.So I paid him 100 bucks and got out of the rick.
I stop a passer by.
Me:Excuse me,Where is Ispahani Center?
PB1: pata nahi jee,mein yahan naya aaya hoon
(oops..finally someone who understands hindi...but he doesnt know the place..what bad luck!)
I move on to the next passer by.
Me:Excuse me,Where is Ispahani Center?
PB2:###########
Me:Tamil ille..English??Hindi???
PB2:(smiling)#####(and he shows me a direction)
I start moving in that direction.Suddenly there is a shout (in tamil) from behind.Its PB2 shouting something at me.He is pointing towards a group of people near me.I am like ..What???He continued pointing towards those people (who are not looking at either of us).Finally I understood what he wanted to say.He did not know where the place is!!!.He had just told me to go and ask those people sitting there!Oh God!!
Fortunately,a few in that group of people could speak english,and as it turned out , knew where Ispahani Center was as well.After a few right and left turns (as explained by them),I finally reach the place.
Later on while reciting this entire incident to my buddies,I came to know that "tamil ille" actually means "there is no tamil" or "tamil does not exist". :P Ooops
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