Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Fin's loss is Mar's gain!

Following is an (edited) version of a chat log between me and my classmate Vikash...

...
Vikash: waise ab maine decide kar liya hai. I'll major in Marketing
me: KYAA?
KYAAAAA?
KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAA?
KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA?
Vikash: bas
bassss
bassssssssssssss

me: yeh sunne se pehle mera GTalk crash kyon nahi ho gaya!
Vikash : Naseeb ko kaun badal sakta hai. My expectations from cost accounting are going loyyyyyyyer. Is it not? I have started appreciating that typically Marketing is what I am made for.
me: Kya yeh tera aakhri faisla hai?
Vikash : Haan
me : par tu toh hamesha finance finance..
Vikask : kehta tha. Par jab utne hi paise, aur dher sa aaraam, jab mujhe Marketing mein mile. Tab koi woh kyon le, yeh na le
me: Maan gaye..
Vikash : Kisey?
me: Aap ki paarkhi nazar, aur marketing ka asar. Donon ko!

Update: Vikash got placed in Wipro (Corporate Finance)


Monday, October 20, 2008

Murphy's law strikes thrice!!!

Had a bad day in the marketing class today. Our professor keeps a surprise quiz when the number of absentess crosses a certain threshold - but the quiz is supposed to be very simple so that all those who are present are rewarded for showing themselves up.

Now then - it was one of those days. The quiz was on a case which we were supposed to do for the class today. The questions were (as I later found out) straightforward.Moreover, it was an open-case quiz, meaning you could make full use of the resources. But then if something can go wrong, then it surely will, and Mr. Murphy ensured all the three doors of escape for me were closed.

1. I had not read the case, had no clue about it.
2. In a hurry for the morning class, I took the wrong Marketing book with me. I spent the first 3 minutes of the 7 minute test trying to figure out where the case was - only to realise I wouldn't find it in that book even if I spent my entire lifetime searching there.
3. For once (probably because of the large number of absentees) there was noone sitting next to me

I might as well have slept off in my room!;)

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Violent me!

I close my eyes...
..and imagine...
the person in front of me is tied on to a chair,and I am splashing hot boiling water on his face...
he minces in pain...
but I am not going to show any mercy..sorry..
next I make him lie on a slab of ice..he screams ... but I just smile a wicked smile...there's worse in store for you mister..
..then I make him travel in an auto rickshaw in Mumbai which is following the exhaust of a truck all the time...and the stream of exhaust is directed right at his face..his hands are tied so he can't even cover his face..all he can do is cough...
...then I make him stand on a railway platform in Mumbai at 7.30 in the morning..and make him board each local train and alight it on the same platform...the mad crowd does the rest..abusing,kicking and punching him at all places..
..and then...it just keeps getting worse..

"Mandar..I think we are done for today, you can open your eyes now"..says the dentist.

I open my eyes,and smile in relief.."done for today"..three golden words I was waiting to hear since the last hour an hour..a period in which I made the dentist go through so many different interesting things in mind...

A root canal is one of those things which you would not want even your worst enemy to experience. And unfortunately, I have had two in the last year. Somehow my teeth behave rather strangely - they skip all the intermediate stages of decay (that I now have by heart what with staring at those posters waiting outside for my turn at the dentist's clinic) and start paining only when root canal is the only solution left - and I have to find more creative ways of punishing the dentist while he is operating on me.

Nevertheless, the visit I had at dentist's yesterday was by far the best ever I have ever had. For the first time I went to the dentist for a "routine checkup" - and not with holding one side of my jaw. It was over even before I thought it started - the dentist gave me a clean chit after having a look at my teeth. And I was more happy than I was at that point in our XLRI adventure trip - when we successfully built our own raft, touched the other end of a lake in windy and rainy conditions, and came back with the same number of passengers as we had started with.

So the moral of the story is - brush twice a day to keep the dentist away - a small piece of advice that we have been hearing since childhood but hardly does anyone adhere to. This -as you must have observed in the first part of this blog - is one of the reasons for the increasing violence in this world. This world would be so much more peaceful if only everyone would brush twice a day! ;)

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Isn't it Saturday yet?

Place : XLRI Hostel
Time : 7.00 am,Thursday

Its been 20 days since arriving here.The alarm rings (In my room you will find it ringing every now and then - the "alarm bells" are always ringing ! ).I wake up, and see my roomie has also woken up because of the alarm.And I ask him - "Isn't it Saturday today?" . Frustated,he shouts back "IT'S THURSDAY!!!"

Weekends!Why dont they come a few more times in a week!

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Tamil ille

In keeping with my love of talking about public transport,here I am going to tell you about my maiden auto riksha ride on my maiden trip to chennai last week.:).

Me and a few of my school buddies decided to meet at Ispahani Center (a mall) in Nungambakkam.I had no other means to reach there , but to take an auto.So i ventured out in the hot Chennai Sun looking for one.

I waved at the first empty auto that I saw,and well,it stopped.The driver wearing a shirt and a lungi looked at me and said something in tamil.

Me: Nungambakkam?

He: ########################## (Something fairly long in tamil,couldnt make out a single word)

Me:Tamil ille..English?Hindi?

He:(Smiling ) #############################

Me : (whats he saying...surely he is saying a lot of things.Even a shake of the head would have answered my question) Ispahani Center?Nungambakkam?Gemini Bus stop? ( a few keywords that I had asked my buddies to enrich me with)

He:############## HUNDRED RUPEES ############

Me : (finally..seems like I have a deal here..but why does he have to speak so much knowing that I cant understand tamil?) Thanks..(and I sit in the rick)

The meter in the rick looked cool..the readings were digital (as opposed to the mechanical meters in mumbai ricks).But then how does it matter.They dont use the meters anyway in Chennai.

After about half an hour of travelling,the auto driver slowed down and looked at me..

He: ########### nungambakkam ###########

Me:Ispahani Center?

He( his expression said that he did not know where that Ispahani Center is) ######### Gemini ##########

So we had come to Gemini,now the task was to find Ispahani Centre.It would be close by ,as I had been told.So I paid him 100 bucks and got out of the rick.

I stop a passer by.

Me:Excuse me,Where is Ispahani Center?
PB1: pata nahi jee,mein yahan naya aaya hoon
(oops..finally someone who understands hindi...but he doesnt know the place..what bad luck!)

I move on to the next passer by.
Me:Excuse me,Where is Ispahani Center?
PB2:###########
Me:Tamil ille..English??Hindi???
PB2:(smiling)#####(and he shows me a direction)

I start moving in that direction.Suddenly there is a shout (in tamil) from behind.Its PB2 shouting something at me.He is pointing towards a group of people near me.I am like ..What???He continued pointing towards those people (who are not looking at either of us).Finally I understood what he wanted to say.He did not know where the place is!!!.He had just told me to go and ask those people sitting there!Oh God!!

Fortunately,a few in that group of people could speak english,and as it turned out , knew where Ispahani Center was as well.After a few right and left turns (as explained by them),I finally reach the place.

Later on while reciting this entire incident to my buddies,I came to know that "tamil ille" actually means "there is no tamil" or "tamil does not exist". :P Ooops









Saturday, March 8, 2008

BEST does a Twenty20

Seems like its the season of goodies from the government...With our Finance Minister coming out with a budget full of niceties - tax slabs increased , lower excise rates etc etc.Mumbai's very own BEST buses have come up with a great way of making an average Mumbaikar happy.They have come up with a Rupees 20 ticket that allows you to travel in any BEST Bus for that day.

There already was this concept of a "full-day-ticket".But it was priced at Rs.40.Now this did not make any economic sense for most people.As the longest one way route in a normal BEST bus would still not be more than Rs.20.So only those who travel a lot - changing lots of buses in between - would have been able to benefit from it.But now its a totally different story.With a full-day-ticket for Rs.20 , even a person who travels everyday with a one way expense of Rs.11 stands to save more.Add to that the problem of loose change would be scaled down to a huge extent.Another good thing that they have come up with is more AC buses and at a reduced fare at that.All this does augur well as I believe that BEST in particular , and public transport in general is one of the ways out to reducing the ever increasing traffic + pollution problems in this city.Agreed that the number of BEST buses need to increase by a huge margin.Buses (just like local trains) in peak hours are too crowded and passenger safety is thrown out of the window.We need more buses please!!!Carpooling is another great way of reducing the number of vehicles on the road.And with four wheelers becoming cheaper , we might as well see the Nanos replacing the autos.;)

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Turn on the Radio!

Radio is fresh.Radio is in the phone.Radio is great to have with you in your commute.I often listen to it when traveling in the morning.Earlier it only used to be RED FM and Radio Mirchi for me but since a couple of months I have started trying out others - Radio One,Radio City and Big FM.After giving ear (literally!) to each of them for a while I can say that RED FM seems to be miles ahead of others (at least in the morning),and the reason for that is the RJ of their breakfast show - Malishka. She is more effervescent ,versatile and confident than her peers from other stations , and the distance is real huge."Red FM Shendi" is a real cracker - the radio version of the good old MTV bakra!and thats when she is at her best,calling up innocent victims who dont know they are on radio and doing mimicries with amazing ease.Radio One has a similar section called "Ghanta Singh",but thats no where compared to Shendi.Red FM has fillers called "Kamla ka Hamla" and "Angry Ganesan" which I find absolutely disgusting ( thats when I switch over to other stations).Radio Mirchi's RJ Tarun is not bad too.Radio One has this nice idea of having multiple RJs conduct a session together,so its more like a chit chat than one person talking all the time.Others havent impressed me so far.So next time you are bored while traveling,just bajate raho!